Wednesday, September 7, 2011

work progresses through a visual communication of your own mind to the outside world. life experiences, expectations, perceptions are spawned and cultivated when you draw. just start. the physicality of the process is usually enough to spur the ideals and interests of the subject, if you are actually open to the ethic involved. it is not always about the what. but the do. the physical act of putting media to paper is the end and what carries you to that relationship is only the means. having "fun" is irrelevant. it becomes an intense debate and assessment of learned knowledge and pure instinct begot of choices make of experimentation, desperation, and excitement. when i draw my involvement sometimes does not include the subject i am drawing but the strain and the effort of my hand on the surface of the paper. my breathing becomes heavy and labored when i scrub an area out, i hold my breath till it is done. i give way for accidents, for mistakes. my arm gets tired, i burn my fingers working an area too much. external sensations are usually drowned out. play music with heavy beats, the rhythm will determine your work speed and intensity. also pay attention to your handwriting. a unique look into the lyricism of your lines are always evident in your scripted hand. dont second guess. if a piece is not working out trust in your hand and make your decisions according to a new and fresh view. walk away. do other things. cook. ratios of paint and medium are relative to spices and food. a pleasing taste is like a pleasing visual. visit the ocean. theres is nothing so humbling or so relaxing as giving oneself over to something that is infinitely larger than your comprehension. just like your art, the ocean is always changing. water will never be calm or the same or still. a still pond or puddle will be disrupted by a leaf or a foot fall. know that the only constant IS change. forget your life. forget the girl that left you because she is still afraid of growing up and getting old. all thoughts of this nature are disruptive to your work and are in the end trivial to your work ethic. stay true and honest to that work ethic and your work will never fail of flee from you. adress all other work with care and love. from the most basic "outsider art"(a poor term) to the best master work. it is all relevant to you. honesty. live honestly and you will always have direction. even if there is none apparent. an honest person will have the fortitude to admit they are lost. acceptance is a clear concise way to step forward. honesty to yourself. realism in the most empathetic way. art is suffering. art is not suffering. the way work is produced is relative to your life. it changes with you. honesty and love and an ethical mindset will be the best direction without direction. a life lived based on organized disorder is not a bad thing. it provides a sense of letting go that is as flexible to change and to stability as you will let your self go. make a mistake, a mess, fuck it all up. you will clean it up when you are ready. your perceptions will make that decision for you. trust in yourself. honesty.

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Ice bergs of awareness. no one is or can be aware of who they really are. too many variables. even when retreating to a "safe" mindset. you change. many people look for god. i dont believe in "god" as a higher power, but as a higher perception made by the human mind. of things you cannot know, or are just not open to. many people look for who they really are. what they mean to themselves. i have my own answer to these questions. go to independence park on lothrop st. in beverly massachusetts. walk out onto the stone jetty at about 8pm at high tide. go as far as your fear will allow you. stand on a rock and watch the water flow between the cracks and gaps around you. know that if theres a big enough wave it will swallow you whole. look out into the water at nothing. listen. listen for a very long time. turn around and you will see the world, but you will not be in it. you will be outside of the world, your ears will ring with the crashing sounds of the waves still threatening to take you away. the jetty is your umbilical cord. walk back with the sense that the ocean is following you, waiting for you to slip and fall into it. when you are back in the world again, what ever time you spent out there on that rock, a minute, an hour, feel comforted with the fact that you have spent that time with your true self. with god. you cannot know it when you experience it, but you can be content with the fact that that time was yours and that it has happened.

I visit the ocean very often. I have not done much art in almost three months.








Inspired by a talk given by Bill Flynn. 

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